Category: humour
Charlie’s shoes..
You turn your back on Charlie, turn round again and something has changed in a way that invariably brings a smile..
With the fake summer he got a simple pair of sandals..but he’s invented a new way to wear them. And he’s now wearing all his lycra trainers with a cross too..
Now..where are those nail scissors??
Laters, Kate x
Because..
This is the way I’m feeling today. It’s only a cold. But it stinks.
Laters, Kate x
Tall Tale x
I had a funny with Charlie last week. Nothing to do with wearing my glasses..or having a chocolate face..It was actually at his school..they were having an indepth class discussion about World War 1 and Charlie proudly announced that we have two of the ceramic poppies from the Tower of London, Blood Swept Lands and Seas of Red exhibition at home. His teacher wanted to know if he could bring them in to show the class so the very next day, he eagerly went in with them for his very own, personal show-and-tell. He stood up in front of the class and spoke eloquently about the poppies being the first flower to grow on the battle fields of Flanders, he explained how each poppy represented the death of a soldier..then he was asked ‘And where do these poppies come from Charlie?’ He thoughtfully considered the question..and replied: ‘Tesco’s!’
…Naturally I’m gutted he didn’t say Waitrose..
Laters, Kate x
Charlie x
This is hearsay…so I can’t tell you if it’s actually true…but according to The Husband (who’s birthday it is today – happy Birthday hubby! – which also managed to coincide with the final break down of the boiler. Should I be worried?) Charlie had a rather enlightening conversation with him at the weekend whilst watching Bella ice skate. Apparently he’s desperate for some younger siblings and thinks two more would be ideal. Sadly (wrong word, but he’s got a lot to learn…A lot.) there’s not a snowballs chance in hell of his wishes ever coming true: The wish for younger brother’s and sisters is rather like counting to infinity – it can never be satisfied as someone (In this case, Charlie) always has to be the youngest. But more importantly, that was ten years of my life I gave up and I have no wish to return to. Except Charlie thinks he has a cunning plan which he’s prepared to put into action…according to him, if he pushes my boobies (his words, not mine) five times, it makes a baby!…he knows this is true because he saw it on television! (also worrying. On a different level..) I asked The Husband whether he put him straight and grasped with two hands the perfect opportunity for a manly bird et bees conversation….he said he’s been far too amused watching me run away every time Charlie comes close…
Laters, Kate x
The Ride of Our Life!
The Top Secret Project?…
Started like this..as made by Mandy and Philip.
Went on to this..
Transformed to this..
Then multiplied..by eight..
We added legs.
Lots of legs..
(It was a shock every time we walked in the room!)
And then the top halves! And all for the School Quiz!!!!….
Go to Facebook for the vid!
It was a top, top night..such tables as ‘fifty shades of Farrow and Ball’..’Teachers Pets’ – dressed as animals with school ties and complete with squeakers..and a fabulous ‘my big fat gypsy wedding’ with dresses, cake, tent and fairy lights!
But we won!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
It was really rather fabulous!
Laters, Kate x
Depth and Richness x
Christie Brinkley at 61 – SIXTY ONE! in Bruce Weber’s ‘Better thean Ever’ spring campaign for Barney’s New York.
Whatever she’s got…I want.
Laters, Kate x
Ooops..He did it again..
Walking down the street on a lazy Sunday afternoon, it surprisingly took me a good ten minutes to clock Charlie’s latest outfit choice…
Returning home, he then broke his mother’s heart by attempting to cut his own hair..(you can imagine..I’m still recovering)..but strangely enough, he found out exactly where the sartorial boundaries lie…
Laters, Kate x
Dog Days x
Dog days…or perhaps the title should be: Cycle of Fat..the story of a mother’s waistline?..
Y’see every term starts with good intentions…healthy eating, increase of exercise and determination. And every time it all slips then slides away…why??
1. Because the start of every term requires unblocking the dam of jobs that have been stored up throughout the holidays..to the term time..when of course you’ll have time..hoho
2. It takes a while to crack the routine again: Early mornings, new after school clubs, hockey sticks, gum guards, out-grown shoes, lost PE kits.. but you do and it gets there..so you take the plunge and add in the exercise..adapt to the new routine and wait in hope for the endorphins to kick in (exercise equals endorphins equals happy mum equals not shooting the kids..or so they say) it takes it’s time – no pain, no gain..but you get there.
3. You take pride in the transforming you. Almost back to pre-second baby weight. Yay!
4. Then disaster strikes: School holidays..back to cooking through the day, no walking to and from school, cupboards now over-flowing with kids ‘stuff’ and temptation, meals out, no time to go to pilates or a run – no babysitters, everything is slower now you’re working as a pack, and generally there’s a festival of sorts: Christmas, Easter, Summer Holiday which means much much more alcohol and calories are tripled doubled..
5. So in the time it takes for the holiday to end…you’re back to where you started..
I was talking about this, trying to pin the butterfly down with a friend who’s a personal trainer: She’s got all the stuff in her house to do 15 mins a day to keep the dogs at bay (we’re talking fat cells..)..but she can’t make that mental/physical jump either. On these child-centric weeks it’s incredibly hard to focus the mind and do exercise ‘properly’ so the brain says, why bother, we just want to enjoy this time? We decided it made a difference when you could do activities with your kids, like tennis..but that means waiting till they’re of an age when it becomes worth while. Mine are a bit young and without the stamina, and you really don’t want to book a court just to adjudicate a fight. But we agreed that the problem is, if you don’t even try, the middle-age waist-line just builds up..and so does your age..I can confirm, the older you get, the harder it is to shift..
The truth is, heart on sleeve and tits on a platter: Exercise at this stage of life isn’t for improvement and a parade of rude health, it’s just to standstill..otherwise when the time comes to finally be able to play a genuine game of tennis with the kids…I’ll be the one oozing gently on my mobility scooter..
Food for thought..
Laters, Kate x
The Magic starts here..
The Elf-on-the-shelf has been a stroke of genius to the spirit of Christmas in this house – so much so we had to find him a female companion (mind out of the gutter please….) so Bella had her own elf too (At eight she’s on the cusp of not believing) – their presence has been totally embraced with homemade presents and letters regularly being left for them (generally saying the other has been up to no good!). The other tradition that underlines the children’s belief is their annual message from PNP Santa..it’s a beautiful dose of pure nostalgia – there’s a choice of a free message – which really works if you have young children or only one so you don’t get a repeat..or pay £2.99 for a longer message, more photos and a choice of story..this year, for the first time, I upgraded..it was so worth it, particularly as there was an option for the Elf to get a special mention..how perfectly magical? There’s no denying their power now!
The basic concept is that Santa speaks individually to your child and looks at photos of them through the year in their special book..then they find out whether they’re on the good list…or the naughty list..with the option of behaving better before the big day…it’s very, very, clever and utterly seductive. And it’s not just limited to children..there’s an adults version too with true mirth in hearing this Santa mutter ‘I hear you regularly fart in bed’ and other such gems..
I’ve uploaded Bella and Charlie’s messages to Facebook if you want to see the quality of the messages for yourself, and just for posterity, I videoed their reactions this year:
…Once you have laughed and once you have loved this Christmas..the rest is just background noise..
Laters, Kate x
Spotted! The Elf on the Shelf…
Who said American’s don’t understand irony? It’s thank’s to them we’ve bought our very first Elf on a Shelf to further promote the fantasies of Christmas..The idea is simple: During the day he’s Santa’s eyes and ears, then at night he disappears through his very own door, back to the North Pole…
(Yep..we got one of those too now stuck on our skirting board!) to report back on the children’s behaviour, before returning and reappearing somewhere else the next day..
As it’s the first of December, he made his first appearance today and was quickly spotted. Charlie is a believer and was in awe. Bella was more sceptical: ‘He’s plastic’ was her first comment, before sneaking off to find a long pole to poke him with. ‘Arrrrrrrrrrrr,’ says I, full of knowing..just remember that all toys are inanimate until you’ve gone to sleep..otherwise they’d be caught and put in laboratories and genetically bred to takeover the world’s workforce..and then where would we be?’
‘At Christmas?’ suggested Charlie..
Touche, my child, touche.
Now all the husband and I have to do is to make sure we move him every night ready for the morning, which with the number of festive nights out in the diary, could prove interesting…and we must, must, must resist the temptation of introducing him to Barbie..just think of the potential mess…
He may be little (and plastic) but we’re hoping he’s going to be greater than the sum of his parts…watch this space..
Laters, Kate x
Maison Bentley Style 