Category: Comment

Cracking Curves..

 

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It’s that time of year again when the beach starts beckoning and thinness is worn as a Designer label.  But why do we always fall for the myth that size defines our worth? I’ve been talking to the inspirational Sarah Clark about all things voluptuous and authentic.  Sarah is Positive Sarah, blogger for FatPhrocks and Wingz, and also in her own right on Gorgeously Full Fat. She is a fat and fabulous, fashion-loving freelance writer with a novel, Viva Voluptuous in the shops NOW, perfect for a summer giggle and banishing those beach babe fears…

 

Do you think the term ‘plus size’ is offensive…is it the same as ‘she’s beautiful for her age’ – i.e. words that are surplus to requirement?

Actually – not really. It’s mildly irritating but it doesn’t really offend me as at the moment there’s no way of knowing whether something comes in your size without some kind of extra label. If all clothes, or at the very least a wider range, cane in a bigger size range, incorporating the 26 as well as the 6, the ‘plus size’ label would become completely obsolete because you’d just have ‘sizes’. But because bigger women are catered for so abysmally by most high street fashion (and couture of course, which is arguably even worse) at the moment there’s still a need to define a collection as being plus size. I’m more offended by ‘you’d be pretty if you weren’t so fat’ which is a bit similar to the ‘beautiful for her age’ backhanded compliment. If you’re beautiful, you’re beautiful. Weight, age, size, colour don’t come into it.

 

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(Betty from Pamper and Curves)

In your opinion do you think anyone should be able to wear anything regardless of size…or should women just stick to what suits them?

You know, style is so subjective that I think women should wear whatever they feel good in. There used to be so many prescriptive fashion rules for fatties; no horizontal stripes, no bold patterns, and I even read something recently online suggesting that fat women should make sure they have pretty feet because it gives people something attractive that takes the focus away from their (presumably ugly) fat bodies. I mean, WTF is that all about? At the same time, in some body positive circles there’s a lot of pressure on big women to ‘let it all hang out’ and not all of us are happy with that. It’s been so long since I wore a bikini, in fact, I think I was about eight, that even if I had the ‘ideal’ figure, I wouldn’t feel comfortable showing my midriff off. It’s up to the individual; wear whatever makes you feel good, and don’t be pressurised into adjusting your style to suit other people’s ideas of what looks good. People like Betty from Pamper and Curves, or Leah from Just me, Leah play around with their look and always look fabulous, nobody tells them to stick to black or not to wear leggings!

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(Leah from Justmeleah)

 

3. I think shape plays an important part in choosing the right clothes – are there brands out there that understand shape and are still fashion aware?

Generally, it’s the plus size brands that seem to ‘get’ the shape issue. There are exceptions to the rule, but if you buy a dress in an 18 that’s been designed for a size 10, that little extra bit of fabric isn’t necessarily going to make it suit a larger body. I’ve thought for a long time that one of the reasons couture designers don’t design for larger bodies as a rule is that…it’s harder! Designers like Michelle Ellis of FatPhrocks really know what it’s like trying to find fashion that’s a bit different. She designs for tall, plus sized women and are spot on, whereas even with taller versions of average clothes, they sometimes just don’t quite look right. It’s a lot easier to get a dress to hang properly on a body that’s straight up and down, because there’s nothing in the way of the shape of the outfit. But try doing the same with an 18 or a 20 and it’s a different story. For a start, we all have different shapes; some fat women are hourglass, some apple, some pear. Some of us have huge boobs and a big tummy but slimmish legs. No, it’s a lot easier to design for a slim woman, catwalk wise, because they know it will look the same on all the identikit models.

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(Tess Munster)

 

4. Who are your plus size girl (see…falling into the label trap) style icons and why?

I’ve already mentioned Betty Pamper; she is a real style icon to me, I follow her blog avidly because the way she puts her looks together is just phenomenal. She always looks so groomed and so damn gorgeous. Leah from Just me, Leah is another one, she’s a fashion blogger and completely unapologetic for being large. She also blogs on health and body positivity, and a recent post on body confidence was just so spot on I wish that all teenage girls could read it. Two more; Tess Munster is just like a plus size version of Jessica Rabbit. She’s stunning, she’s faced bullying throughout her life but then she thought “You know what, f*** this” and turned it on its head to become a plus size model. The woman is GORGEOUS, and a real inspiration to anyone who thinks being very fat means that you sit around in tatty leggings and a stained tee all day. Lastly, I love Lisa Lister. She was recently featured in Cosmo Body (July) in her full on beehive and tatt-splashed glory, talking about how she gave up diets and found happiness. She’s so positive and full of energy, she inspires me all the time, and I LOVE her style. She also works with Dove as a Body Image Ambassador, and that has to be celebrated.

 

5. What would you prefer – shops/brands that specifically catered for you – or acceptance across all shops?

That’s actually a really tricky question. What I don’t want to see is just a couple of extra sizes tagged on just to keep the fatties happy, because it would just be an afterthought. I’d love to have more choice on the high street. Bigger women have trouble finding clothes in many towns; in my own they’ve just shut down the local Evans, New Look stopped stocking their Inspire range and the only places you can get clothes over a size 18 are a few concessions in Debenhams, or Marks & Spencer. The other thing that’s annoyed me for a long time is why stores like Next who have clothes in size 20,22 and 24 only usually have up to an 18 on display. Yet, they will have the size 6 out. So in convoluted reply, I would like more targeted plus size options in existing shops, and a few more plus size shops on the high street would be lovely too, I’m fed up with having to order my clothes online just because I’m fat.

 

6. Why is acceptance across all shops so hard – particularly when you look at the average size of UK women?..

That one I really can’t answer. My opinion is that fat isn’t ‘aspirational’ enough to warrant attention from the fashionistas, nobody WANTS to be fat, so why display clothes on fat mannequins or cater for larger people in designer or even high street stores? It’s as if they want our money, so they’ll cater for us behind the scenes like Next, making us order the larger sizes online so we don’t have to take up room in their shops! Page 2 of 3Page 3 of 3Talking of taking up room, not that I go into Top Shop very often, but younger shops like Top Shop and River Island are so tightly crammed that fat people can’t even squeeze though the racks in some shops! I think it’s probably a ploy to keep the chubbies away from their lovely tiny clothes personally, but they are missing a trick. Get Beth Ditto or someone in and get working on a collection for big, younger women, and they’ll get loyalty from a completely new section of the market. There’s so few young plus sized fashion options in shops that it’s ridiculous.  I’d love to see the them –vs- us mentality that seems to be all pervasive at the moment disappear up its own backside and be replaced by a tolerant, inclusive acceptance that bodies come in all sizes and it’s actually OK.  aND I’d love to see more designers like Michelle Ellis of FatPhrocks, designers who understand the needs of tall and plus size women and design individual, unusual clothes that cater for the people who actually wear them, rather than being identi-copies of the slim ranges in the shops.

 

7. Magazines also claim that their content has to be ‘aspirational’ – What do you say to that?

In my dreams I’d love to start an intelligent magazine for women that includes women of all shapes, sizes, ethnicities and abilities….with everything from fashion to philosophy and food, which didn’t treat women like idiots, airheads or vacuous bimbos who can’t do anything without taking a selfie or actually CARE what Katie Price is doing!

 

Sarah, I salute you.

Laters, Kate x

 

Cool Running..

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 I look at this kitchen and my heart lights up.  Then I think: Where’s the fridge?

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 Arrrr ok. Pure Love.  But how big actually is it? Not that I’ve developed a thing about fridges, except I have.  It’s one of the reasons we’re re-doing our kitchen..the fridge is too small.  So now I’m obsessed by them…

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And it really doesn’t help when I find Companies like this – The Vintage Fridge Company, dedicated to unearthing relics of the past and smoothly integrating them into a modern-day antique heirloom, proud to take their place in any room.  I remember my Grandparent’s house in Greece having an ‘icebox’ at the back – and it worked, even in those high temperatures though milk was still a luxury and tinned carnation milk was always the order of the day – it gave the tea a unique, memorable flavour.  But that old icebox would be the sort of thing these guys would take on, except after their magic, milk wouldn’t be a problem.

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Spot the fridge..

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Or this one..part of the perfect island unit..

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If you have to have something functional, why not make it count for something?

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The perfect trade-off between practicality and beauty..

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They also offer the option of taking a modern fridge and cladding it in old..

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Or if utterly modern is your thing check out he Formula one beauties that are the Meneghini beasts..

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This is the version Nigella Lawson has.  Sigh.

Sadly all these options  – the reconditioned vintage and the new – cost from £7000 upwards to £16400 plus…So whilst it’s good to know the humble fridge can be more than defiantly average, I will just have to dream I have the budget to indulge..until then, I’l start doing the Lottery.  Again. And put on my thinking cap…

Laters, Kate x

(Photos of top kitchen from remodilista.com)

The Runs..and an update x

 

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I’m running the GSK Orange United Run 5k today at Dorney Lake where the Olympic rowing events were held.  They don’t know it yet but the Husband, Bella and Charlie are running the 2.5k..hehe.  This is the acknowledgement of keeping the fitness training up since January…except I’m not on my best form..had a migraine yesterday, all much better today but the halos of the remains are sill hovering around the edges and it’s a hot day with mucho sunshine…lots of water and dark glasses me thinks.  To top it off we have a big party tonight I’ve been so looking forward too..no rest for the wicked hey so fingers crossed..and thank God this run’s sponsored by a drugs company…

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The beautiful setting at Dorney Lake where Eton have their rowing club..the view from the club house.  The clouds were starting to roll in..

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Pre-start nerves..

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Slightly disconcerting to see this on the floor of the portaloos….I suppose it could’ve been worse…

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Go! The husband being beaten by a sleeping child..

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Damn! Pipped to the post by a Dame! Although I got the style points for running in a denim jacket (didn’t have time to take it off..but don’t tell anyone) (and the truth is I even got beaten by a labrador) But despite the heavens opening on us about halfway round, it was a fab family day for which Fairy (in photo above) get full points for organising… it’s not often you can say you ran in a Race with a double olympic gold medalist!

 

 

 

 

Now where’s the Doctor before I hobble to my party??

 

Laters, Kate x

Sweet Life..

 

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(Ear cuff by Ryan Storer, now sold out – Boo!)

Walked into the utility room this morning and found the sock box all over the floor. Again.  How many times have I said to the kids if you go for a rummage – leave the room as you find it – if you disturb anything PUT IT BACK? I start moaning to the Husband who’s trying to get dressed.  ‘It’s not a big thing, but it’s representative of a larger issue,’ I say. No response.  I tell myself don’t linger on the negatives but everyone needs a rant at some point..in the evenings he gets to offload work on me so a voice says, why can’t I moan about my work? I’m the first to say mines not the job that brings in the money, but sometimes it’s the hidden work that holds a family together:  It’s the monotonous, grunge, brain numbing stuff that’s like groundhog day every day except it largely remains invisible as if fairies have been at work.  So I say, ‘it’s the invisible work I do that needs a bit of respect’.  Still no response.  I can feel the emotional plates shift like a red rag to a bull…’That’s just perfect, I’m so invisible (read taken for granted) no-one even hears me..I don’t want practical solutions, I don’t want a conference call or a European Summit but just an acknowledgement or a grunt will do’…nadah…I continue, climbing upon my very high horse..’I consider the work of a mother one of the most vital on the planet.  It’s the foundations stone that builds future lives, holding them together, keeping them moving forward in a (generally) clean and (hopefully) happy manner..it’s seven days a week, 365 days a year and for all this I get..nothing..zip..zilch..I live off your income and get not one iota of recognition from the government, not a tax break, not nothing..and as for society…well if this is indicative of society’s attitude..'(voice rising in crescendo..)

He pulls out his headphones..’Did you say something, Darling’?

Men. I really just give up.

And from now on I’ll be charging the kids 10p off their pocket money every time they mess up my utility room.  A girls gotta earn her money somehow….

 

Laters, Kate x

Geo-caching..

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Ever heard of Geo-caching? Nor had I until a friend mentioned it..it’s an app that basically uses GPS to find treasures hidden by others all across the world (over 2 million and counting).  We used it for the first time on our little holiday..First you see a map that marks where the booty lies, then a compass points you in the right direction and counts down the metres to your prize.

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The pleasure is it leads you to unexpected places..the journey is half the fun..

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Our trail led us to this memorial dedicated to Airmen from World War 1.

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You get within 10 feet of the treasure..then you have to start looking..

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Success!

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Inside was a log book to mark your discovery.

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And then you can choose a prize – as long as you’ve got something to put inside as well..we left some dice!  Then it’s time to return it to it’s little hidey hole for another explorer to find..

It’s a fabulous way to add an extra spin to a day…any day!

Laters, Kate x

 

A Modern Icon x

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I have a new state-of-the-art heroine and her name is Dr. Victoria Bateman.  For her birthday she and her husband decided to commission a painting of her by the Artist Anthony Connolly.  In the nude.

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What do you think when I tell you Victoria is also an Economics Fellow at Gonville & Caius College, Cambridge?

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In many ways it’s really such a simple thing – a naked body – but what she has done has sent blasts through so many mental walls.  It’s a beautifully observed and performed satire on perceptions, maximally liberated and impeccably crafted introducing a huge pink elephant to hang languorously in the air….that society does not believe a nude can be an intelligent, academic woman, comfortable in her own skin.

 

Victoria says: ‘When I first came up with the idea I thought it would be a conventional portrait but the more I thought about it, I realised that doesn’t really represent the truth about me.  The more I went through the artistic process, the more I began to think about women and their role and portrayal in society. At the age of 34 I am comfortable in my own body. Reaching a certain age and realising that life is not infinite, I wanted to capture a moment in time.  Initially this snapshot was going to be conventional.  But the more I thought about it, the more I could see the value in creating a work that was both ‘honest’ – that showed me comfortable in my own skin – and that, as in my academic work, was not afraid to break through the pre-existing barriers and to raise important questions.’

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Unlike so many historic nudes there’s a different power of suggestion and behaviour in her portrait.  In the past many poses have been of women caught unawares, captured in an unwitting moment, an onlooker peeking round a door.  But here Victoria stares directly out giving the painting an extraordinary force.  She chose a natural, relaxed  pose, beyond the superficiality of a TV soap, which says more for female body confidence than any written word ever has.

 

My view is that we will never eradicate the overtly sexualised images of women – they will always be profitable to produce, as well I understand as an economist.  instead I feel that the best way of providing an antidote is to also make sure that we show women as they truly are – it is a confident, relaxed, natural and of a named woman who is not being objectified with fake additions and photoshopping.’

‘Some people might say I’m not better than a page 3 girl but the message behind it is I am not just a body. ( And conversely – I’d say – that she is not just an academic – she has a body)  ‘I wanted to show that each woman has a female figure that literally walks around with her every moment in her life – it’s not simply sexual.’

 

Victoria Bateman has weilded the power to defy industry moulds and underline herself as an individual.  I love her because too many people let who they are become secondary to what everyone else wants them to be and it’s then that we build up walls for ourselves and others.

 

Bravo Victoria! Brave, courageous and brilliant.

Laters, Kate x

Time x

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Time is the universal equaliser the world over and remains the one thing that money can’t buy.  It’s an arbitrary beast – running slow at Doctor’s appointments, running away on holidays and moments of wonder.  Which means despite it being a mathematical unit it has a hidden, nebulous, time warp quality and, given half the chance, it is a thief.

 

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I was originally a Professional Violinist but the one thing I truly hated was practising – repetitive, robotic and boring.  I soon learnt that if I practised intelligently I considerably reduce the monotony – and it’s this discipline I’ve taken into my day to day life: Cut down the grisly bits to the least time possible and use the time left over to breathe.

 

The truth is generally we start the day with a list of things we need to accomplish, we start working through it and before we know it the day is gone and the list has barely been dented.  The next day more stuff piles up and we’re permanently lugging around a constant burden of responsibility and expectation that never ends.

 

So I have 2 Golden Rules and a System – (it’s not Rocket Science, it won’t work for everyone, but it works for me.)

 

The Golden Rules:

 

1. ‘Things’ take less time than you think.

2. The ‘Things’ should never dictate time it takes to do them.

 

The System:

 

1. Write down a list of EVERYTHING. Then write a list of what you need to get done this week, prioritise for the day if needs be, but then divide the rest of the list  over the rest of the week: The moral of the story is long lists never, ever work – divide and conquer and you stand a chance.

2. Give each job 15 minutes – and it is here in the objectivity of technology where the truth lies – SET AN ALARM (honest to God the time remains constant) (I use my phone) for 15 minutes.   When it goes off, move onto the next job, re-set the alarm and start again…in the great scheme of things it’s a pee in the ocean: The accumulative effect packs a punch.

3.  Need to tidy the house? Set the alarm for 5 minutes or 10 minutes for each room – you’ll be amazed at how much you can get done.  The rest of the time is now YOURS.

It also works to create boundaries for the Creative side too – My great love is that absolute joy-zone where’s no effort and you’re transported away from the world.  Given the chance I’d be permanently on my happy-dappy planet –  except nothing practical would ever get done and my house and all those contained within it would fall to rack and ruin.  By using an alarm and setting a limit (30 minutes – 45 minutes?) I give myself permission to ignore everything else for that period of time and just be.  I can safely zone out.  And come back home again.

 

What it does mean is that jobs don’t necessarily get finished (although you’d be surprised how much does – there’s an automatic sense of focus that comes from dictating a specific period of time) – but take my light, the patio, the shirt..not finished..but, given time, they will be..and now I’m controlling them instead of them controlling me..and bit by bit you find great riches in  those small steps..It’s about both squeezing the most from everything..and taking that time to smell the roses..

 

Laters, Kate x

 

 

 

 

 

 

Linking to NY! x

Introducing the kids to Anarchy..

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On Saturday we headed into Trafalgar Square to witness the Flash Mob International Pillow Fight.  Even the street performers were prepared…

 

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It was a rather delicious event..the Police weren’t happy.  Boris had done his best to call the whole thing off…but to take action against a pillow fight? It would be like aligning with Putin…

 

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Have I shrunk?

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The power is strong with this one..

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Charlie telling Darth Vadar he loves him..

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We then headed up to Oxford Street and couldn’t help notice the speed of the Jeremy Scott rip-offs…

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Our destination?….a Victorian men’s toilet..

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Now converted into a supercool cafe called ‘The Attendant’ complete with table-urinals and handwarmers.

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At the exit was a writing wall..

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So Bella added Graffiti to the days lessons of life…

Laters, Kate x

Every Now and Then x